


Against The Dying of The Light

by OpheliaGlorfindal



Series: For Those We Have Lost... [5]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cunnilingus, Dancing, Established Relationship, F/M, Female Friendship, Female Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Final Fantasy XIV: Heavensward Spoilers, Final Fantasy XIV: Stormblood, Final Fantasy XIV: Stormblood Spoilers, Fluff, Forehead Kisses, Forehead Touching, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gift Giving, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Kissing, Lewd handholding, Morning After, Morning Sex, Mutual Pining, Patch 3.0: Heavensward Spoilers, Post-Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn, Post-Final Fantasy XIV: Heavensward, Post-Final Fantasy XIV: Stormblood, Pre-Relationship, Reunions, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Sea sickness, Secret Relationship, Self-Esteem Issues, Semi Established Relationship, Short & Sweet, Slow Dancing, Smut, Sneaky gift giving, Spoilers, The Dragonsong War (Final Fantasy XIV), Touch-Starved, Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:15:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26131009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OpheliaGlorfindal/pseuds/OpheliaGlorfindal
Summary: Just a place where I put my self-indulgent Wol/Thancred fics or ficlets that are too short to warrant posting on their own.  They might not necessarily be in chronological order.
Relationships: Alisaie Leveilleur & Warrior of Light, Tataru Taru & Warrior of Light, Warrior of Light & Thancred Waters, Warrior of Light/Thancred Waters
Series: For Those We Have Lost... [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1792330
Comments: 9
Kudos: 23





	1. Hot Chocolate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally posted as a standalone one-shot, but I feel that it fits better in this series as it never felt like a complete story to me...
> 
> Also, made a few minor edits and will probably make more. This is set during the Post Heavensward patch 3.2 and after the quest, Choices so spoilers if you haven't got that far yet.

“You don’t have to do this, you know,” Thancred remarks as Seraphina slides a mug of steaming hot liquid across the table towards him. He picks up the mug, gazes down at it and wrinkles his nose, “Is this —”

“— Hot chocolate, yes,” Seraphina replies as she sets down her own mug and sits in the chair opposite him, making sure she isn’t in his blind spot. 

“We used to drink mead together, remember?”

She grimaces as she stares into her mug. Her stomach twists uncomfortably as she remembers what had happened the last time they had drunk mead together. It leads her to recall the time just before the banquet when they had agreed to find time to discuss things. But that was before, before all the possibilities of what they could be were ripped away by the monetarists of Ul’dah. 

She heaves her shoulders, trying to push down the feelings of longing that had bubbled to the surface in the days since they had found Thancred. It took all of her energy to repress them, the stubborn things. Thancred’s experiences in the Lifestream and Dravanian Forelands have hardened him and now with the news of Minfilia...it was best to leave it alone. 

“I know,but it is far too early for mead,” she replies, looking up at him and forcing a smile, “ And, I don’t find alcohol very appealing any more...so hot chocolate it is.”

She takes a sip, trying to ignore the fact that Thancred is watching her carefully, his expression impassive. She glances around the kitchen of the Fortemps Manor, savouring the sweet taste of her drink as slivers of the morning sun shine through the windows. They sit in silence for a few minutes, quietly mulling over everything that had happened in Falcon’s Nest.

“How is Lord Emmanellain?” Thancred’s voice cuts through the silence, causing Seraphina to look up. “And the boy?”

“The chirurgeons say that Honoroit will recover in a few days,” she replies, “Emmanellain is ...fine. He’ll have a nasty bruise, but he’s come to his senses at last.”

“Ah, I shall have to apologise to the boy,” he replies before taking a sip, “I fear that I overreacted.”

Seraphina blanches. In all the chaos of the night, she had not expected Thancred to punch the young lord out cold. 

“I can’t deny that you should have handled yourself better, but your words seemed to have had a positive effect on him. How is your hand by the way?”

Thancred raises his hand and flexes it, inspecting it closely.

“My knuckles are a bit bruised, but nothing a salve won’t fix,” he reassures, the corners of his lips curling into a ghost of a smile, “Don’t worry.”

Seraphina’s heart lurches for a few moments, but she does worry. It had not escaped her notice how withdrawn Thancred had become since discovering the fate of their Antecedent and the events of the night had only given her more cause for concern. Granted Emmanellian had pushed him too hard — especially after Minfilia — but even so, it was not like him to lash out so viciously. She sips her drink, wondering whether it was better to broach the subject of their recent loss or not. Maybe it was better to leave it alone for now.

“So, you’re to fight for Ishgard in the melee?” he says, breaking the silence that had fallen between them, “I have to say, the Lord Commander could barely contain himself. I wouldn’t be surprised if he popped the question soon.”

Seraphina’s back tenses, the back of her neck prickles. Did he think — is she imagining it or is there a hint of bitterness in his voice? No, best not to go there. Best not to look for a hidden meaning behind his words. Not when...not when he might not want the same thing as her. Whatever that was. Instead she shakes her head and shoots him a chiding look, causing him to chuckle.

“It’s not like that,” she replies, trying to ignore the flush that was blooming on her cheeks, “I didn’t have much of a choice and after everything that House Fortemps has done for me, it felt right.”

She stares into her half empty mug of hot chocolate, feeling a small pang of nostalgia. The time the three of them had spent in Camp Dragonhead after fleeing Ul’dah felt like a whole lifetime ago. She thinks of Haurchefant and Ysayle and how determined she is to not let their deaths be in vain. Thinking of them still hurts, but it is a dull pain; the kind someone feels when they press down on a bruise that is still healing. She still misses them terribly. How many more people did she have to lose in the name of protecting Eorzea? 

“Seraphina?” there is a faint hint of concern in Thancred’s voice, “Gil for your thoughts?”

Seraphina blinks as she feels a swell of emotions rising in the back of her throat. She feels tears pricking behind her eyes. She takes a shaky breath, trying to let the sadness pass over her like a raincloud and focus on the crackling of the fire in the hearth instead. She can feel Thancred watching her, trying to ascertain what she’s thinking. She can’t talk about it. Not yet. She shrinks in on herself, suddenly feeling very exposed. The fear that he was going to ask her about the friends she had lost, whispers to her in the back of her mind. She takes another deep breath and another, finally tearing her eyes away from her drink. This isn’t supposed to be about her. 

“It’s all right,” she replies, fixing him with a cheeky grin, “You couldn’t afford them anyway.”

Thancred gives her a swift searching look, before chuckling softly. 

“Ah! There she is, there is the angel I remember,” He remarks, his voice soft, “And here I was thinking that you had changed more than just your hair.”

Seraphina’s eyes widen and her cheeks heat up. Angel. He used to call her that before — a silly nickname he would use to make her fluster. She gives him a reluctant smile as she curls a lock of blonde hair around her finger absently. At first, she had dyed it to hide from the monetarists and then it had become almost symbolic, a way of convincing herself that she had been moving forward. That the person she used to be had been left far behind in the past. 

“You’re a fine one to talk.” She gestures to the bandana covering his eye. 

Thancred gives her a lopsided smirk, causing her heart to jolt. Seraphina curses herself, apparently she still is not immune to his charming smile and the fluttering feeling it causes in her stomach. But now is not the time to give credence to such feelings; especially as she was certain he did not return them and they had far more pressing matters to address. 

“Purely aesthetic, I assure you,” he replies, draining his mug of hot chocolate, “Makes me seem more roguish does it not?”

Seraphina scoffs and rolls her eyes. Is he trying to convince her or himself that his right eye is fine? It’s difficult to tell. And it’s so typical of him to deflect the conversation, to distract her with his stupid sense of humor so that he didn’t have to discuss what he’s really thinking. Maybe he hasn’t changed all that much after all then.

“I’m sure it will go down a treat with the ladies of Ishgard.”

“They are a proud warrior nation after all,” Thancred says, his eyebrow quirking upward in a curious expression. 

She laughs and swirls the hot chocolate in her mug around a bit more, trying to ignore the fact that he was still watching her, still trying to read her. She wishes that he wouldn’t. It makes her feel vulnerable and small and it’s something she did not need to feel right now. Not after everything that’s happened. Not after she had lost everyone she cared about — after she lost him. Not after she spent moons forcing herself to swallow her own grief, forcing herself to move on. After all, why should Thancred be privy to her thoughts when he wasn’t forthcoming with sharing his own?

They sit in silence for a few moments more. Seraphina finishes the dregs of her drink, cursing herself for letting it go cold. She looks up at Thancred, fascinated by the way the soft light and shadows of the hearth play across his face. 

“Thancred?” she asks, biting her lip, “Will you stay for the melee?”

Thancred gives her a small smile and shakes his head. She feels her heart plummet.

“I shouldn’t, we need to find out more about the Warriors of Darkness and —” he sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. “And we have yet to find Yda and Papalymo.”

Seraphina nods, hoping that he can’t see her disappointment. Of course he wants to get back to work. She can’t blame him. But a small part of her wishes that he would stay. She doesn’t feel — it isn't safe. Aymeric has barely recovered from his wounds and she’s sure that they’ve both still have plenty of enemies in Ishgard; people who are just waiting for the right moment to further sabotage the peace they fought so hard for. She needs him, she needs her friends. Just in case someone decides to use the melee to cause more chaos. 

He gives her another smile and says something that she doesn’t quite hear because she’s busy focusing on the confusing maelstrom of emotions swirling about in her head and trying to make sense of it all. She wonders whether he's waiting for her response or whether he has noticed her inattention and will tease her about being distracted by his handsome features the way he used to. 

“Thancred—” she begins, reaching across the table and grabbing his hand without thinking. Her words die in her throat as she notices the way his brown eye widens, no doubt taken aback by the sudden gesture. 

Seraphina’s cheeks heat up so much that it’s a miracle that her head hasn't burst in embarrassment. She drops his hand and retreats backwards, wishing that she could turn invisible. 

“Sorry, I just don’t — I mean, stay for the melee. Or at least think about it,” she says softly, “It’s supposed to be fun and — and I’d like you to be there.” 

Thancred raises an eyebrow as he sits at the other end of the table. He’s frowning as he considers her words. Seraphina swallows as she meets his gaze with wide eyes. Her heart is beating in her chest. Why is this so important to her? She tries to tell herself that it’s because she’s just found him, that she thought he was dead and she needs to make sure that he takes care of himself. That it has nothing to do with what happened before the banquet, or her own feelings of abandonment bubbling up to the surface. 

Thancred smiles at her, his expression softening.

“Who am I to refuse such a request from a lady?” he says, ruffling his hand through his scruffy hair, “Besides, given our history of attending prestigious events, maybe it would be prudent if I were on hand to observe.”

The muscles in Seraphina’s back relax and she lets out a breath she hadn’t realised that she’s been holding. At least this way she can make sure that he looks after himself properly; that he doesn’t lose himself to his grief and self-hate. 

“Excellent,” she replies, giving him a bright smile, “I can show you my new skills. I might even use some of the techniques that you taught me.”

Thancred snickers. 

“Ishgard will be sure to lose if you do, angel.”

She shoots him with her best affronted look and folds her arms. 

“I’ll have you know that I’ve improved a lot.”

He cocks an eyebrow, unconvinced. Seraphina fails to stifle a yawn as a wave of tiredness finally washes over her, 

“Well, this is something I have to see,” he replies, standing up, “But mayhaps another day; you need to rest and I fear that I am keeping you awake.”

Seraphina bids him goodbye and watches as he walks across the kitchen. Her thoughts writhing in indecision. She should say something. Nothing comforting. But something to let him know that he isn’t alone in his grief.

“Thancred?” she calls, just before he reaches the door, “You know you can talk to me about anything — if you — when you’re ready, I am here.”

His shoulders stiffen and he freezes for a few moments before turning around to look at her. There’s a wounded look in his eye. Something in her chest cracks and breaks as he gives her a wan smile.

“I — I know,” his voice cracks a little, “Thank you.”

And then he turns around and leaves her sitting alone in the kitchen, listening to the sounds of the morning chorus and trying to make sense of him. It seems that Thancred was going to be keeping her awake for a few more hours, just not in the way he had assumed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I change my character's hair colour/style a lot when I play games (particularly RPGs) mostly because it gives a sense that time has passed. (or a sense of character development, in this case.) My WoL was in a really dark place going into Heavensward and kind of let her hair grow long because she wasn't looking after herself that well/was too focused on helping Ishgard. Also, I headcannon that in Eorzea, you can get magical hair dye and therefore don't need to bleach your dark hair before dying it blonde because well, why not?


	2. A Sneaky Gift

Seraphina heard the sound of the sea slapping against the hull of The Misery, causing it to rock violently. From somewhere on the deck, she heard the sailors shouting at each other. She cursed silently as another wave of nausea hit her as she rifled through her pack, throwing her clothes about the cabin with reckless abandon.

“You’d better clean that up,” Tataru’s voice drifted across the cabin they both shared with Lyse and Alisaie. “You’re not the only one who has to sleep in the cabin.”

Seraphina glanced over her shoulder at the lalafell who had perched on the edge of one of the bunks, her expression disapproving.

“Sorry, I’ll clean it up, don’t worry.”

“ Gods, you look so pale, Seraphina.”

“Have you seen my sea-sickness elixir?” She clenched her jaw as she continued to throw her neatly packed clothes around the room, trying to ignore the roiling in her stomach and the vomit rising in her throat. “I’m sure I packed it.”

“I’ll go and ask Alphinaud if he has any left.” 

“Thank you, Tataru!” Seraphina called over her shoulder as the lalafell left the cabin. 

The ship lurched violently, almost sending her sprawling across the floor. She swallowed, trying to distract herself from the nausea building in her stomach. She reached back into the bag, silently praying to whatever gods may be listening that she had remembered to pack the elixir. Her hand hit something smooth and metal. She paused, her curiosity piqued as she pulled it out of her pack.

A hip flask? No, she had never owned one. She’d been meaning to buy one ever since the protest in Falcon's Nest, but somehow she had never got around to it. Her endless duties as a Scion and the Warrior of Light always got in the way. So how did it wind up into her pack? She couldn’t remember picking it up. She was sure that she would know if she had knowingly picked up somebody else’s belongings.

Seraphina turned the flask around in her hand, her fingers tracing the delicate scrolling vines that were engraved into the silver. It was simple, but no less beautiful and it was something that she would never think to buy for herself. Its owner clearly had good taste. Seraphina furrowed her brow as she noticed a thin blue ribbon tied around the neck with what looked like a torn corner of a card still attached to it. A gift then? But who’d --

Setting the flask aside, she rooted around in her pack some more and pulled out the small card, it was torn in the top left corner. She opened it up, the message inside was written in very familiar loopy handwriting.

_I thought you might need this, just in case._

_Please stay safe._

~~_I’ll miss_ ~~

_Yours,_

_Thancred_

“Thancred, you stupid fool,” she muttered under her breath, unable to stop a smile from spreading across her face.

She reread the words scrawled onto the card several times, feeling the full weight of the words he had written. It was funny how a few hastily written lines could cause a warm syrupy feeling to erupt from her chest like the middle of a chocolate pudding. Seraphina bit her lip, marvelling at how a few simple words could convey so much that they had yet to voice to each other. 

“Seraphina, Tataru said you needed a sea-sickness elixir, but my dear brother is busy sleeping so I--” Alisaie’s voice cut through her thoughts, causing her to jump as if she had just been hit by lightning. “What have you got there?”

Seraphina’s cheeks grew hot as she watched the young elezen’s gaze flick from the hip flask to the gift card in her hand..

“It’s a gift, someone must have snuck it into my pack before we left,” She explained, staring fixedly at a spot above the elezen’s shoulder. 

Alisaie lent against the doorframe and folded her arms, her eyebrow raised.

“Who’s it from? Does it say?”

“No one...uh, a friend.” Seraphina couldn’t stop her lips from curling into a bashful smile as she stuffed the card into her pocket.

Gods, what was wrong with her? She was behaving like some love-struck teen who had been sneaking out behind her parents back, not like the mature, full grown adult she was supposed to be. 

“Right,” the elezen said, giving her a calculating look. She shook her head and sighed, “Anyway, here’s the sea-sickness elixir.”

Alisaie held out the bottle of murky green liquid and Seraphina stared at her, frozen like a startled rabbit. She blinked for a moment, before accepting the bottle.

“Ah yes, of course, thanks.” 

Seraphina cursed silently as Alisaie gave her a knowing smirk. “Right well, I’m going to find Lyse. I’ll leave you to your tidying.”

Seraphina let out a deep breath as she watched the elezen leave the cabin. Sometimes, the young woman was far too perceptive for her own good. She slipped into a happy daze as she picked her clothes off the floor and began to pack them, trying to ignore the fluttering feeling in her stomach that had nothing to do with sea-sickness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My boyfriend and I were discussing the fact that if you play a female WoL, most of Stormblood is essentially just three friends on a girly road trip around Othard. (Whilst trying to free Doma from the tyrannical grip of the Garlean Empire )
> 
> Also, this was partially inspired by the fact that I suffer with motion sickness and any car journey longer than about an hour is hell for me unless I listen to music to distract me. (Theme parks are also completely wasted on me.)
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading. :)


	3. A Quick Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place towards the end of Stormblood, so there are spoilers.

Thancred sifted through the pile of reports that lay on his desk, trying to distract his thoughts. It was late and the cool air blew through his makeshift quarters in Rhalgr’s Reach, causing the flame of his candle to flicker and dance. He rubbed his hand over his face, his mind running through the events of the last few days.

Seraphina had returned from Othard with Alisaie, Alphinaud and Lyse, much to his relief. And his regret —their reunion had been far too brief and impersonal for his liking. But there had been no time. Krile was still missing and both of them had been sent out on separate errands. Their duties as Scions coming first before anything else. 

But gods, it had been good to see her. Even if only for the half bell it took him to tell her of what had transpired whilst she had been halfway across the world in Othard. He remembered how his fingers twitched, just itching to tangle themselves in her hair. It was shorter than it had been when she’d left, now it hung a couple of ilms below her jaw and he had noticed that she had decided to return to her natural black hair colour. It took every onze of his willpower not to pull her into an embrace and kiss her senseless. If only to convince himself that she was really there and not some mirage that he had conjured up for himself. 

“Thancred, why are you still awake?” Thancred jumped as Seraphina’s voice drifted into the room. 

He grinned as he stood up from his desk and strode towards her. She looked even more tired and dusty than she did on the day she had arrived in Castrum Oriens. But she was beaming at him, tucking her hair behind her ear as she closed the gap between them.

“It’s good to see you too, angel,” he quipped, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close. He breathed in the scent of earth and sweat and citruses that clung to her skin as if it was oxygen. It was such a relief to hold her, to feel her arms squeeze tightly around him as though she was scared that he would dissolve into the air if she were to let go. 

She chuckled as she reached up and traced the features of his face as though checking that it was really him standing before her. He closed his eyes and smiled, relishing the feel of her fingertips on his skin again. 

“I missed you,” she sighed as he leaned into her touch. “I’m sorry our reunion wasn't quite what I had envisioned…”

“Nor I,” he replied, cradling her face in his hand, “But if you will allow me, I will attempt to make amends.”

Seraphina’s eyes widened as Thancred bent his head down and pressed his lips to hers in the deepest, most ardent kiss he could manage. Her breath hitched, causing him to smirk a little as she kissed him back just as soundly. Her fingers gripped his shoulders as he lifted her off her feet a little, savouring the softness of her lips against his. Finally, after the stress and worry of the past few weeks, he felt like he could breathe again. It felt as though he could put aside his worries about Seraphina’s safety and about finding Krile for a few moments and just rejoice in having her in his arms again.

“Well, that was...quite a welcome,” Seraphina remarked breathlessly as a pretty pink blush painted her cheeks. “I’d say that you’ve more than made amends.”

Thancred set her back down. A warm, satisfied feeling sat in the pit of his stomach, the kind one gets after eating a particularly delicious warm meal. Only it was the knowledge that he was the reason for her smile that was causing it instead. 

“Is that so? I’m not so convinced.”

He nudged her nose with his before leaning in for another more gentle kiss, winding his fingers through her dark hair. He was like a desert when it finally rained; he simply couldn’t get enough of her. Of the taste of rolanberries on her lips, of the way she let out a quiet little moan as one kiss melded into another and another…

“Gods I’ve missed you,” he whispered, diving in for another kiss. But she leaned away, tucking her hair behind her ears and looking up at him demurely. Thancred frowned and furrowed his brow in concern. “What is it, angel?

She bit her bottom lip, a cautious look in her deep blue eyes. 

“It’s nothing—not really,” she replied, hesitating a little. “It’s just that I know we have seen each other in moons and well, I know that we usually — there’s really not much room in here and you — but it’s so late and I am exhausted and —”

The corners of Thancred’s mouth quirked up slightly as he caught the meaning behind her rambling. He lifted her chin up with his thumb, so that he could keep eye contact with her.

“Angel,” he told her, his voice soft, “It’s okay; this is enough.”

She blinked, giving him a twisted smile. Something was still playing on her mind; he could tell by the way that she was hunching her shoulders; her spine taught like a string that was about to snap. He frowned.

“You’re worrying again.” 

“Thancred, it’s not that I doubt your abilities or anything — I just can’t—”

“—Help it?” he supplied.

Seraphina nodded, biting her lip. He raised his eyebrows, half amused at her pointless worrying and half flattered that she found him worthy of concern. He sighed, cradling the back of her head with his hand as he planted a kiss on her forehead. 

“Darling, I can’t promise you that there won’t be danger,” he murmured, “But I will try my hardest to stay safe.”

“Good.” She said, trying and failing to stifle a yawn.

“Mayhaps we should go to bed, you look like you’re about to fall asleep standing up.”

“You’re one to talk.”

Thancred chuckled as they changed into their sleep clothes before curling up on the narrow cot. Despite the uncertainty that lay in the days ahead, he felt a small sense of calm as he pulled Seraphina close to his chest, trying to make the most of what little time they had together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my boyfriend and I reached the end of 4.0.
> 
> I imagine that WoL must have been exhausted after returning to Eorzea and then learning about everything that had happened whilst she was away. 
> 
> I might come back and change this because endings are the absolute German sausage.


	4. Safe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place at the end of Stormblood, so major spoilers ahead.

Thancred’s heartbeat pounded through his body as he hurried through the hallways of the Royal Palace, pushing through the throng of bodies. Here and there, he could see small groups of Imperial troops attempting to flee as the Alliance and the Resistance pressed their advantage. His ears roared as he fought off a few stragglers who were too determined to yield, ignoring the muscles aching all over his body. Surely, it couldn’t be much longer before the victory was theirs? 

They had almost done it. They were so close to defeating the Garleans and freeing Ala Mhigo from the tyranny of the Empire, Thancred was sure of it. Though as comforting as this certainty was,it did nothing to drown out the worry that was gnawing in the back of his head.

“Yugiri, I’m going to find Lyse and the others. Can you deal with the stragglers?”

The auri ninja who was covering his flank nodded as she parried an attack from a particularly skinny hoplomachus; the clanging of metal on metal reverberating off the walls of the corridor.

“Of course, I think they were heading towards the Menagerie.” She yelled, shoving her opponent into the wall. “Go!”

Thancred thanked her and sprinted down the hallway. He needed to find them. His friends, his family. They needed him. But more importantly, Seraphina needed him too. After all, he had promised that she would not have to face Zenos alone, not this time and he fully intended to make good on his promise. 

He wouldn’t be too late, not this time.

The dissonant sound of a victory horn cut through the clamour of battle. Thancred picked up his pace as a flash of dark hair and purple clothes dashed past him. His chest stung from the exertion and he could hear his heart beating louder with every step he took. But he didn’t care. He had to reach Seraphina, he had to make sure that she was alive.

He rounded the corner, almost colliding with Yugiri as he skidded to a halt. The Au Ra gave him an odd, questioning look and raised an eyebrow as he muttered an apology to her and turned his attention to the red garbed figure walking towards him. 

“It’s over! Ala Mhigo is free!” Lyse exclaimed as she stopped in front of them, grinning from ear to ear. Her excitement was infectious, but it did nothing to placate the dread growing in the pit of his stomach.

He cast his gaze over Raubahn, Hien and Alphinaud who were following her and frowned as he desperately tried to read their expressions. They looked exhausted from the battle, but there was no sign of sorrow on their faces. 

“And what of Seraphina? Where is our champion?” He tried his best to school his expression, but his fists betrayed him as he balled them up tightly. 

“Oh, we couldn’t have done it without her,” Lyse babbled, “She should be —”

Thancred swallowed as he glanced over his fellow Scion’s shoulder. A familiar head of black hair was weaving through the people standing in front of him. His heart skipped a beat as Seraphina was standing in front of him, covered in dirt and blood and cuts and bruises but otherwise hale and whole. 

“Zenos is dead,” she gave him a weary smile. “It’s finally over.”

Relief swept over Thancred. She had come back to him. Somewhere deep down, he knew that she would. Not only that, she was victorious. He stared at her and grinned. This woman — this fiery, stubborn, kind woman never ceased to surprise him. It took all of his willpower to refrain from sweeping her up in his arms and kiss her breathless. Their relationship was still very much an open secret among the other Scions and he knew that she would not appreciate it becoming known with such a public display of affection. 

“Lyse,” he grinned, not taking his gaze away from Seraphina’s. “I think it’s time you meet the public, don’t you?”

Lyse nodded and walked towards the edge of the terrace where a crowd of soldiers and cautious civilians who were brave enough to leave the safety of their homes stood waiting for her. Thancred hung back as Hien and Raubahn followed her, catching Seraphina’s gaze. 

“By the twelve,you scared me for a moment there, angel,” he told her as she sidled up to him. 

“I’m sorry,” she replied, “I’m just glad that you’re safe too.”

“It’s okay,” he told her, “We should go, I wouldn’t want to deprive the crowd of your vaunted presence.”

He smirked as a faint blush stained her cheeks. She rolled her eyes and gave him a wan smile as she laced her fingers with his. 

“I hope this doesn’t take too long, I could sleep for a week.”

“Well, that’s a shame,” he quipped, “I was rather hoping that you would have enough energy to grace me with the honour of dancing with you at the victory celebrations.”

She sighed in mock exasperation before giving him a fond smile. “Hmmm... I will. But only because it’s you.”

They joined Lyse at the edge of the terrace, greeted by a sea of people standing and waiting for her to speak. Instead, she stepped forwards and began to sing the first lines of the Gyr Abanian national anthem. The true lyrics filled the air, gradually getting louder and louder as more and more people in the crowd joined in until it became a wall of voices. Thancred felt something heavy and warm on his left shoulder. He smiled as he looked down to find that Seraphina was leaning her head against him, a comforting reminder that she was safe.

Something in his chest swelled as he realised that this was the first time they had been so openly affectionate to one another in public. Yes, it was only a small gesture, but that did not diminish its meaning — that Seraphina wasn’t afraid of showing the world that she was with him. That as undeserving of her devotion as he was, they were together and that their bond ran deeper than that of mere friends or comrades. Thancred sighed and squeezed her hand, grateful that Seraphina had returned to him and was by his side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, one thing about being in a second lockdown is that I am trying to keep my mind off things by writing. It's working out okayish so far...
> 
> I had to change it a lot because I wasn't sure whether to go for the dramatic "I'm so glad you're alive" kiss or keep it low key. But decided that since Thancred and Seraphina just never got around to officially telling people and their relationship just became this open secret amongst the Scions that no one talked about, they would still attempt to keep it low key in public. 
> 
> As always, thanks for reading. :)


	5. A Moment of Calm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This follows on from the last chapter kind of...
> 
> I wanted to practise writing a dance scene, so this is the result...

“So this is where you’re hiding,” Thancred’s voice drifted across the night air and the jaunty music floating up from the party below. 

Seraphina tore her gaze away from the victory celebrations that were taking place in the streets of Ala Mhigo below her. She smiled as Thancred strolled across the rooftop towards her.

“Mind if I join you?” He asked as he sat down next to her. 

Seraphina chuckled as she nudged him with her elbow. “You know, you’re supposed to ask before you sit down. It’s a good job, I don’t mind your company.”

“High praise indeed from the woman of the hour.” Thancred’s mouth quirked into a smile as she groaned and fixed him with a flat stare. He chuckled as he scooted closer to her, the warmth of his body heat seeping through the fabric of her blouse.

They sat in companionable silence for a few moments, watching as fireworks lit up the night sky in bright flashes of red and green. Seraphina sipped her bottle of Ala Mhigan ale, savouring the way the alcohol burned as it slipped down her throat. Thancred bumped her arm with his, smiling as she handed him the bottle.

“Hmm,” he said as he took a swig from the bottle and handed it back to her, his fingertips touching hers briefly. 

Seraphina blinked up at him and raised an eyebrow. He was smirking, no doubt he had thought of something new to tease her for. Deciding to take the bait, she tipped her head to one side.

“What is it?” She asked.

“Oh nothing,” he chuckled, “It’s just amusing how you always seem to sneak away on your own at parties.”

“And you have an uncanny knack of finding me.”

“What can I say? I pride myself on knowing your habits.”

Seraphina scoffed as she sipped her drink and passed it back to him.

“One of your many skills, I am sure,” she replied before sighing. “It’s not my fault, I just find these things so overwhelming.”

“Given your history with such events, I don’t blame you.” He gave her a twisted smile as he tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “I hope my company offers some sort of balm for those feelings.”

A fond feeling warmed Seraphina’s chest as she leaned in and rested her forehead against his. She smiled as she ran her fingers through his unkempt hair. As much as he seemed to enjoy teasing her, she could not deny the sense of calm his presence brought her. It was as though she could put aside the mantle of being the Warrior of Light for a while and be her complete self around him, ugly parts and all. 

“Your company could never be unwanted, Thancred,” She whispered as she brushed her lips against his. “Certainly not by me.”

“And they call me silver tongued.” Despite his remark, he smiled and nuzzled her nose with his.

“Seems like you’ve finally rubbed off on me.”

He barked out a laugh, tossing his head back in a way that reminded Seraphina of the man she had first met in Ul’dah. The one who was quick to laugh and joke and flirt with her, before the loss of Minfillia and the Lifestream had changed him. It was good to see him relax a little, she thought. To see him enjoy the moment rather than focus on the next mission, the next problem that needed to be solved. It was something she wished he would do far more often in the future.

“Anyway, I do believe that you promised to dance with me,” he said, placing the bottle of ale to one side and getting to his feet. Seraphina eyed him somewhat warily.

“Thancred, I don’t want to go back down there,” she told him, blushing a furious shade of red. “What if people notice and start rumors? I thought we agreed --”

“We don’t have to go down there, angel,” he said as he got to his feet and offered her his hand, “I don’t know about you, but I can hear the music from here.”

Seraphina rolled her eyes, giving him a reluctant smile as she placed her hand in his. His calloused fingers folded over hers as he pulled her to her feet, giving her a rakish grin. Instinctively, she placed her hand on his arm and took a deep breath as she felt his right hand splayed against her shoulder-blade. 

“It’s been a while,” she remarked as he took a step forward.

He smiled at her, his eye twinkling as they began to dance to the slow beat of the music. Her body responded subconsciously to his movements. She wasn’t quite sure what dance Thancred was pulling from, but it certainly wasn’t anything remotely resembling the traditional Ala Mhigan dances Lyse had tried to teach her. 

“It has,” he agreed as he shifted his weight to his left foot, “Not since well before Ul’dah.”

She smiled, remembering the way they used to dance together to entertain the other Scions after a few too many drinks in the Rising Stones. It seemed like a lifetime ago and the people they had been back then bore little resemblance to the people they were now. Back then, neither of them had any notion of what they meant to one another. Not really. Both were far too focused on their duties to acknowledge the idea that they were more than friends.

“We could’ve danced together in Ishgard, but I remember that _someone_ was too busy brooding to ask.”

Thancred gave her a wry smile. 

“Well, someone was too busy dancing with a certain dashing Lord Commander, if I recall.”

Seraphina rolled her eyes and quirked the corner of her mouth. Their time in Ishgard felt so long ago, but she could still recall the panic she felt when she had, on impulse, kissed him on that balcony. She remembered the feeling that she was getting in far over her head, the fear that she had ruined their friendship and then, the swooping happiness when he kissed her back. That moment still feels as though it happened in a dream, even now. 

“It worked out in the end,” she told him. 

“Aye, it did.” He twirled her under his arm.

Seraphina looked up at him as she returned to hold. She rested her head on his shoulder as he held her close, both of them letting their bodies move in time to the slow, quick, quick rhythm of the music playing on the streets below them. She heard him hum under his breath as they swayed together, fireworks cracking into bursts of bright light in the sky above them. She closed her eyes, savouring the warmth of his body against hers and inhaling the scent of sandalwood that clung to his skin. This was what she needed. A moment of calm after a day of fighting and facing the person she feared the most. It reminded her to savour these moments whenever she could. To revel in these brief reprieves and cling to happiness whenever she found it. 

Seraphina smiled, never in her wildest dreams had she thought she would find happiness with Thancred.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TFW you lampshade a lot of certain situations that you use in your other fics...
> 
> This fic was actually very difficult to write, in part because I've been very low on spoons. But also because when I was a kid, I took ballroom dancing lessons for a while so it was difficult to describe what they were doing without going into the minutiae of the steps. Many YouTube dancing tutorials were watched in the writing of this. In my head, they were doing a sort of Rhumba...because why not?
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading. Stay safe!


	6. Morning After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this takes place after my fic, [Leather and Sandalwood](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24463468).
> 
> It's a little angsty, but I found my original ending for that fic and plot bunnies happened...

Seraphina rubbed her eyes, trying to chase away the sleep that clouded her thoughts. She was lying naked in bed, the blankets warm against her skin. The room was not hers, that much was apparent from the lack of personal effects and the fact that there was a box of half unpacked things on the floor. She felt the warm weight of someone’s arm around her waist and heard the quiet, steady breathing of her bedmate. Her thoughts suddenly cleared and began slotting together like the pieces of a puzzle. The familiar scent of leather and sandalwood on the sheets added even more clarity to them.

_Oh._  
_Oh shit._

Her whole body tensed as she recalled with far too much clarity the events of last night. She bit her lip as she wriggled to loosen her bedmate’s grip on her waist and turned around, trying to ignore the sense of dread growing in the back of her mind.

“ _Fuck_ ,” she hissed as she found herself staring at Thancred, blissfully asleep.

What had she done? She’d ruined everything. She had crossed a boundary and done irreparable damage to their friendship. He was her colleague, for Twelve sake. What if this moment of weakness got in the way of their work? What in the name of Menphina, had they been thinking?

She hadn’t. Neither of them had. But there was not much she could do about it now. It was done. They’d both taken their harmless flirting too far and had done something that neither of them could take back. She sighed, wondering when she would have to deal with the consequences of their actions.

Seraphina carefully unwrapped Thancred’s arm from her waist and placed it in the space in between them. She watched him carefully, but he barely stirred. Seraphina sat up, trying her best to ignore the way her body cried out for the comforting feeling of his skin against hers. He looked so tranquil with his jaw slack and his lips parted open slightly. Strands of his silvery hair fell into his eyes and she reached out to brush it out of his face. 

Seraphina hesitated. What if she woke him? The poor man hardly got enough sleep as it was. She’d heard him screaming in the dead of night, his time being possessed by Lahabrea no doubt haunting his dreams. He was still very much recovering from his ordeal, both in body and in mind so he needed all the sleep he could get. 

Delicately, she brushed a few strands of hair out his eyes with her fingers. He murmured something and smiled in his sleep, causing her heart to do odd little flips.

_No. Stop that._

Seraphina slipped out of bed and began to pad about the room, picking up her clothes. She mustn’t get ahead of herself. She didn’t know what this meant to her let alone Thancred. She grimaced as she pulled on her clothes, question after question running through her mind. She could find out the answers if she just woke him up. But she didn’t have time to discuss things; duty called her to Gridania and she needed to shower. To wash the scent of him from her skin before she left. 

_It was just a quick tumble. That’s all._

Nothing more than mutual loneliness and the need to feel close to someone. They’d both been feeling pretty isolated recently, what with her new title of Warrior of Light and his recovery from Lahabrea. She repeated this to herself in her head several times as she laced up her shoes. Better to not expect anything more. After all, Thancred was known for flitting from bed to bed, never staying with one person for too long. There was no way he’d want anything more. Not from her. 

_He’s just attracted to you because you saved him. It’s probably run its course now._

Yes, it was best to not expect anything more from him. It was most likely something purely physical to him. Something fun, yet fleeting with no deeper meaning or emotional connection behind it at all. But then, there had been a barely concealed vulnerability in Thancred’s eyes when he had asked her to stay the night. It was as if he couldn’t admit to himself that he needed her close and was not just trying to be a gentleman by letting her sleep in his bed. And then there was the softness he had to his voice when he called her ‘Angel’, as though it was meant with genuine affection and was not something that had fallen out of his mouth in the heat of the moment…

_No._

It was probably just her imagination running riot. Her mind was running over every single detail of the night before to try and convince her of something that she wasn’t sure she wanted. She glanced at the chronometer on the wall, if she didn’t leave soon she was going to be late. Seraphina searched in vain for some paper and a quill but she couldn’t find anything. Of course, it was probably in one of the unopened boxes on the floor. Typical. 

She bit her lip. It didn’t feel right to just leave. Not without writing a note at least. She could wake him up, but she was sure he wouldn’t appreciate being roused so early. Besides, she didn’t have time to have the long talk they needed. She glanced down at him, still sleeping peacefully and blissfully unaware of the confusion of emotions roiling inside her. 

“What am I going to do with you?” she sighed as she pulled the blankets up over his shoulder.

Seraphina walked to the door and glanced back. Maybe it was good that she had duties to attend to in Gridania. It would give her a chance to focus on something else and maybe clear her head. The time apart would give them both time to sort through their thoughts and feelings and figure out what this meant. 

And then, once she returned, they would talk. And she would find out the answers to all the questions running through her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ended up being way more introspective than I intended, but never mind. I figured that Seraphina would have an 'Oh shit!' moment when she's had some time to process sleeping with Thancred. Plus she's still a bit oblivious to her feelings towards him at this point and didn't expect it to go beyond harmless flirting between friends initially. 
> 
> In Heavensward, she feels hella guilty about not waking him up or having the chance to finish their conversation at the Banquet. That whole expansion is not a fun ride at all for her...
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading. I hope you stay safe!


	7. Caress (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was written in response to a prompt from [seaswolchallenge](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/seaswolchallenge/638302054350225408) on Tumblr. I haven't managed to keep up due to life stuff so there isn't enough to warrant it's own post.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is set post Stormblood so there are spoilers in this.  
> Also, it's NSFW because smut.

"Mmm Thancred, that tickles," Seraphina murmured, still half asleep. She wiggled slightly as he trailed kisses down her neck, his beard scratching her skin.

His arm tightened around her waist as he pulled her closer and nuzzled the crook of her shoulder, mumbling an apology in her ear. His other hand skimmed her flank, slipping under the fabric of the shirt she had borrowed from him. His fingers ghosted over her belly, sending sparks skittering across her skin. She sighed as she stretched and craned her head to capture his lips in a soft, slow kiss.

Thancred responded with a heat that sent tingles down her spine and sparked a fire deep in the pit of her belly. She let out a quiet moan as his hands wandered back up her body, stroking the underside of her breasts in light teasing touches. She turned onto her side to face him, burying her hands into his silver hair as one languid kiss melted into another and another and another…

It felt indulgent to lay there with him in her bed, especially so late in the morning. But they had not had the time to be together like this in so long; their duties sending her to Othard and him into Ala Mhigo to look for Krile. Now that Zenos was finally defeated, no one would be looking for either of them. At least not for a while.

Couldn’t she — would it be too selfish, to spend this time with him? To just be an ordinary woman losing herself in her lover rather than the vaunted Warrior of Light, just this once. 

Thancred pushed her onto her back and chuckled as he covered her body with his own.

“What is it?” the question came out somewhat breathier than she had expected.

“I have to say, angel, I am surprised by you,” he replied, smirking as he tugged at her shirt and pulled it off over her head, “I’d have thought you’d need more convincing,” He put on a mockingly high voice, _"Oh no, Thancred, we can’t — what if someone comes looking for me?"_

“Then they’ll get the shock of their life."

He arched an eyebrow and spluttered out a laugh. 

“Someone’s feeling reckless, what’s gotten into you, my angel?”

“Maybe you’ve finally rubbed off on me.” She felt her cheeks heat up, cursing the way he never failed to make her blush with his teasing. “Besides, I’ve missed you.”

“Hmm, but I’m right here.”

His fingers were drawing random patterns across her abdomen, sending tingles across her skin. Seraphina rolled her eyes at him as she brushed his hair out of his face. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“Oh?” His fingers stilled and his voice dropped to a sinfully low tone that made her shiver. “And what, pray tell, did you mean?”

She swallowed, feeling the blush on her cheeks deepen.

“Just that I missed this,” she replied, her thoughts scattered in all directions as his fingers drew closer and closer to the apex of her thighs. “A-and I— oh gods!”

Her hips bucked as he brushed her clit with his thumb in slow circles. She kissed him fiercely as he pressed a finger into her entrance, her teeth catching his bottom lip. A low chuckle rumbled through Thancred’s chest as he trailed kisses down her neck, over the swell of her breasts and lower and lower until…

“Twelve, Thancred!” she gasped, her fingers tugging his hair gently. 

She writhed against him as he continued his ministrations. Her pleasure coiling tighter and tighter until it snapped, sending shocks ricocheting through her body. She moaned his name as he worked her through her climax. 

Seraphina opened her eyes as Thancred came alongside her again. She leaned up to kiss him, tasting herself on his lips. She could feel the heat of his arousal against her thigh as he bent down for another searing kiss. 

“Gods, I want — I want _you_.”

“I love it when you say that,” he murmured, smiling as he nuzzled the crook of her neck. He squeezed her thigh, the calloused touch of his fingertips searing into her skin as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He groaned as she pulled him down, desperate to feel the warm weight of him against her body. “Don’t worry, you’ll have me.”

“Please,” she whimpered, canting her hips, her body seeking more friction. Her hands gripped his biceps. “ _Please, Thancred —_ ”

Despite the softness of his smile, Seraphina could still see the dark, hungry look in his mis-matched eyes. She let out a soft hiss as he entered her. This was what she had been missing all those moons she had spent in Othard and the busy days in the lead up to Ala Mhigo’s liberation, the feeling of his body pressed against hers, the heat of his breath as murmured jumbled words and phrases of praise in her ear. This was what she wanted. Just the two of them, moving in tandem; their responsibilities shut out by the lock on the bedroom door so that they could just be together. Just an ordinary couple taking pleasure in each other. 

Seraphina felt her climax storm it’s way through her body, shattering into a thousand tiny pieces. She was vaguely aware that Thancred was nearing his release. He thrusts becoming more and more stilted as he moaned her name in her ear. It was a sound that she would never get tired of hearing. She peered up at him as he gave her a lazy smile, his breathing ragged. 

If she had her way, they would spend the rest of the day behind the locked bedroom door just so that she could spend as much time with him as possible before their responsibilities called them away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like Thancred and my WoL deserve some sleepy morning sex and some fluff after the end of Stormblood. My boyfriend and I are playing through the post Stormblood patches. Our friend who has played through it all has set us the challenge of getting to Shadowbringers by February...we are like three days behind schedule.


	8. Hold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another response to a prompt from the [seaswolchallenge](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/seaswolchallenge/638302054350225408) on Tumblr. 
> 
> This takes place after the meeting in the throne room in the post Stormblood patches, so there are spoilers.

Thancred found Seraphina sitting in the flowers in the royal menagerie, of all places. She was sitting alone, staring up at the stars in the sky as she hugged her knees. The throbbing anxiety in the back of his mind, abated slightly. She was sitting before him, hale and whole and safe. For now.

“I’m not intruding am I?” he asked, deciding that it was best to announce his presence rather than sneak up on her. 

She glanced over her shoulder as he approached her, giving him a fleeting yet bright smile. “Of course not.”

He felt a familiar warm glow in his chest as he sat down next to her. He watched her as they remained silent for a few moments. She was wearing a contemplative expression as she returned her attention to the sky before letting out a heavy sigh and leaning against him. 

“Gil for your thoughts?” he said, despite already knowing what was most likely playing on her mind. Better to ask her so they can talk about her troubles, than let her bottle them up as she was still wont to do. It was a privilege that he was the one who she trusted enough to open up to and share her worries with. 

“I just — it’s been an eventful day,” she replied, glancing up at him. 

“That’s one way of putting it.” He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "But everything was alright in the end," he said as much to himself as to her.

“I know,” she sighed, “I know that, but I just — it felt a little too —”

Thancred grimaced. “Familiar?”

She nodded, her expression wan. He couldn’t blame her for being so shaken up. After all, he was still a little keyed up himself, the blind panic he had felt when he had first heard the commotion coming from the throne room had subsided to guilt. Guilt that he had been too late to help. Again.

“I think I should start avoiding these important meetings,” she said with a shaky laugh, “They always go awry.”

Thancred arched his eyebrow and the corner of his lips quirked upwards as he returned her embrace.

“But then, who would be on hand to defend us when someone inevitably summons a primal?”

Seraphina looked up at him with a weary look. 

“Yes, that’s me,” she deadpanned, “Eorzea’s bodyguard and ever the hero.”

Clearly, his poor attempts at humor were failing to lift her out of her mood. Guilt nagged at the back of his head, he knew that being the Warrior of Light was a heavy burden she bore and that sometimes it was easy to forget that there was a person behind the legend. Not that he would be much use to begin with; without the ability to manipulate aether, he was nothing but a glorified shield made of flesh.

Seraphina rested her head on his shoulder and he drew comfort from the weight of it. After all the excitement and anxiety of the day, it was a welcome relief. A reminder that they were both safe, that she had returned to him in one piece. They sat like that, in silence for a few moments, just staring up at the stars.

“Thancred?”

“Yes, angel?”

“Can I tell you something?”

"Of course. You can tell me anything, you know that.”

She looked up at him, biting her lip as she considered her words for a few moments. 

“When I was fighting Lakshmi in the throne room, I wasn’t thinking about — all I could think about was you,” she admitted as she turned to face him. “I didn’t know where you were, whether you were hurt or enthralled…”

He looked down at her, taken aback by her words. The idea that she held him in such high regard was one that still seemed alien to him. He was and will always be a scrappy wharf rat from Limsa Lominsa who happened to pick the pocket of the right person. Twelve knows why she hadn’t come to the realisation that she could do far better than him. But that didn’t matter right now. What mattered was that she was looking up at him with an expression of vulnerability that only he got to see. If only he could match her sincerity and tell her all the things he ought to. But the words just wouldn’t come out of his mouth.

“You don’t need to worry about me,” he said as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his lap. “I’m still me.”

He held her close to his chest and she squeezed him tightly as though she was scared that he was going to disappear at any second. 

“I know, I know that,” she said as she looked up at him, her blue eyes shining bright like stars. “But it’s just not…”

Thancred frowned as he stroked her hair, watching as she tried to wrestle with her emotions and give a voice to the worries that were swirling around in her head. He knew that it was difficult, that the nature of their work would always come with risks. They had discussed it at length when they had begun their relationship; but that did not mean that it got any easier for them. The time apart and the constant danger that their duties involved would be enough for any other person to end things before they began. But as undeserving of her affections as he was, he was too selfish, too captivated by her to let her go. 

He cradled Seraphina’s jaw in his hand and kissed her lips deeply, hoping that it would be enough to prove to her that he was real, sitting there corporeal in her arms and still very much him. She responded with an urgency that matched his, her fingers bunching the fabric of his jerkin. Neither of them seemed to care that anyone could walk up and catch them or that their relationship was still supposed to be a secret; they were far too caught up in the moment to remember that they were in such a public place. 

“We’re still here,” he murmured, leaning his forehead against hers. “And we’re still here, together.”

“I know.” Seraphina sighed as she closed her eyes as he tucked her hair behind her ear.

“Is there aught else I can do to assuage you of your fears?”

“Just hold me for a little while longer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did toy with the idea of having a slightly spicy ending, but it didn't fit and I kind of like it as it is. Anyways, thanks for reading.


	9. Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place post-Heavensward, after the quest 'Consequences'. It's before Seraphina and Thancred become a couple and are too busy dealing with their issues to admit their feelings.
> 
> Also, this is quite angsty...

Thancred always thought that his self control was one of his strengths. He had honed it over the years, along with his ability to blend in and charm people into giving him whatever he needed. Being able to keep a clear head and school one’s emotions had played a key part in helping him gather intelligence and get him out of trouble when needed. It had helped him to survive in the moons he had spent alone in Dravania where one single misstep could have meant that he would end up being some beast’s dinner. 

Yes, in terms of his emotions, he would say that his self control is impeccable. But not tonight. Thancred flexes his fist, bruises already begin to blossom on his knuckles and his jaw is still throbbing. He glances from Emmanellain lying prone on the ground, to Seraphina who is hunched over the young lord’s manservant desperately casting healing magics. An odd sort of silence rings in the air and he walks away, suddenly feeling ashamed. 

He hadn’t meant to lash out. It had been a culmination of all his pent up guilt and grief since learning of Minfillia’s fate. His foul mood had been swirling around like gathering storm clouds for days now and it had not been helped by the tensions and high emotions in the wake of the riot, or the panic he had felt when he had found Seraphina sprawled out unconscious on the tavern floor. When Emmanellain punched him, his control snapped like a thread. 

Thancred hears the sound of boots tapping against the cold stone. He freezes for a second and glances over his shoulder. Seraphina is half-jogging towards him. He heaves his shoulders and continues to stride off, quickening his pace. He doesn’t want to talk to her. He doesn’t want her concern or her anger, he just wants to be alone with his thoughts. 

“Thancred, wait!” Her voice rings in the air, but he ignores it regardless. Maybe she will get the hint and leave him alone. He can hear the pace of her footsteps quickening. Her voice sounds laboured as she raises it, “Hey! I’m talking to you. _Hey!_ ”

Squeezing his eyes shut, Thancred halts and turns around as she catches up to him, almost tripping over her own feet in the process. She looks pale and exhausted, no doubt a result from the poison and exerting her energies attempting to heal Honoroit. 

“Are you trying to make me chase you across Ishgard?” A small part of him is relieved to hear that there is no trace of anger or disappointment in her tone. “I just wanted to make sure you —”

“Whatever it is you have to say, don’t.”

If she is hurt by his bluntness, she doesn’t show it. Instead, she holds her hands up as if to placate him. 

“I wasn’t,” her tone is level and calm as though not to aggravate him further. “I just wanted to see if your injuries need any healing.”

His anger recedes slightly and is followed by yet another jab of guilt. The poor woman looks like she barely has enough energy left to keep herself standing upright. He fights the sudden urge to chuckle, of all the subtle changes he had noticed in Seraphina after being reunited, her habit of putting everyone else’s needs before her own had not been one of them. He heaves his shoulders. After his behaviour, he didn’t feel deserving of her spending up the last of her energy to heal his bruises.

“I’m fine, I assure you.” His words come out sharper than he intends, but he hopes the firmness to them puts an end to their conversation.

“Thancred, I’m —” she begins, bites her lip and starts again, “Please, just let me check?”

He sighs as she takes a step closer to him, her proximity causing his heart to beat faster and his chest to constrict. He flinches as she reaches out and brushes her fingers against his bruised jaw. It’s a reflex borne out of instinct. He hasn’t been touched since, gods, since before the Bloody Banquet. It’s been so long that it’s no wonder his skin breaks out in gooseflesh at the feeling.

Thancred casts his gaze aside as he feels the tingle of her healing magic. His chest feels tight and heavy as he remembers that Seraphina was the last person who had touched him. More guilt lances through him. They had been on the brink of something promising. Something that had lain between them, that they had yet to fully address. But it was something that a very selfish part of him wanted, despite his best efforts to supress it.

“There,” Seraphina whispers as she draws her hand away from his jaw and reaches for his bruised hand instead.

_I’m sorry you had to see me like this._

Somehow, the words were incapable of coming out of his mouth. He meets her gaze for a few moments. Her blue eyes are wide, but there’s no hint of anger or sympathy in them. Instead there is just weariness and gentle concern. Thancred is vaguely aware of her fingertips brushing across the back of his hand as he draws it away from her. He doesn’t deserve her. He knows this. He is certain that she would not want him now, not after his shameful display.

“Mayhaps, you should reserve your energies, Ang— Seraphina,” he replies, his voice softening. “It’s been a long night, no doubt you need to rest.”

“I can’t,” she gives him a pained smile, “I need to speak to Lucia first.”

As always, duties must come first, even above her personal well being. Not that he could talk. He was — and still is — the same, except he has already experienced the brutal consequences of his own over-working. Consequences that still haunt him in his nightmares.

“Then I shall join you,” he tells her, “I’ll be able to give a fuller account of what happened, what with you being drugged and all.”

Now that her enemies have shown themselves, it behoves him to stay with her, in case they decide to take advantage of her weakened state and attack her. The very fact that she isn’t alone should be enough to put them off. In any case, he wants to stay by her side, if only to make sure that she makes it to Falcon’s Nest without collapsing from exhaustion. 

“Ah, still a gentleman, I see,” she remarks, giving him a brief flicker of a smile. “Come on then, let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like Thancred's self esteem issues very much rear their ugly head in the post-Heavensward patches. I just want to give him a hug...and maybe makes sure he eats a proper meal...and takes a nap...
> 
> Let's face it, the poor guy needs it.


	10. Concern

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically, this takes place in the Post-Stormblood patches when everything begins to go south. Seraphina has way too much on her mind. 
> 
> It turned out longer than intended, but eh.

Thancred clenched his jaw as Seraphina tapped her fingers rhythmically against the table they were sitting at. He tried his best to focus on the reports he was reading, but the sound was too distracting now that he had noticed it and there was no way that he could return to his work whilst the sound niggled at him.

He glanced up at Seraphina and frowned. She was fully engrossed in her book, chewing on her bottom lip as she read. To anyone else, she looked perfectly relaxed, letting herself get completely absorbed by whatever it was she was reading. But he knew differently. He could tell by the stiffness in her body that something was weighing on her mind. 

No doubt it was many things. She’d been tense since she’d returned from Doma, since they had found out that Zenos’ body had gone missing. Since the theory that he had been possessed by an Ascian had been floating around. She’d done her best to hide it, to be the stoic Warrior of Light everyone needed her to be. 

“Angel,” his voice cut through the silence as he reached across and covered her hand with his own. “Can you stop that, please?”

“Hmm?” Seraphina looked up from her book, “Oh, oh I’m sorry.”

He couldn’t help but smile at her stricken expression, it was somewhat adorable.

“It’s quite alright, my dear,” he replied as he drew his hand away, his attention drawn to the angry red skin around her fingernails from where she had clearly been picking at them. 

Seraphina gave him a flicker of a smile before returning to her book, resting her head on one hand. Unable to shake his concern, Thancred tried his best to return to reading his reports and noting down anything of interest.

A few beats of silence and the tapping began again. He suppressed a groan and glanced up at her, frowning.

“Seraphina.”

“Yes, Thancred?”

“You’re doing it again.”

She blinked owlishly at him as though she had woken up from a daze. “Am I? Sorry, I — ”

“— Angel, just talk to me.”

She tilted her head to one side as though she was trying to figure out what he meant.

“About what?” she asked, biting her bottom lip.

Thancred sighed. He’d spent the best part of the last few days pretending that he hadn’t seen through the stoic façade she’d attempted to keep up; deciding that he would allow her to come to him in her own time. But as she became more withdrawn, his concern only grew. His patience was beginning to wear thin and he was beginning to get sick of watching her pick at her food during meals. 

“About whatever it is that is clearly weighing on your mind.” He shuffled his reports and put them to one side. “And don’t insist that nothing is amiss,” he added before she could protest, “we both know otherwise.”

Seraphina had the look of a frightened animal. Had he been too harsh? A gentler opening would have resulted in a frustratingly circular conversation with her insisting that he had nothing to worry about. Better to give up all pretence completely so that he can try and avail her of her troubles.

She took a deep breath and her shoulders sagged as she closed her book and wrapped her arms around her. His heart sank as her gaze dropped to the table.

“I don't know it's just— I feel, I should’ve done more,” she shrugged her shoulders, “I should’ve done more to protect Tsuyu from Asahi, should’ve convinced Alphinaud not to go to Garlemald alone — ”

“— As rash as his decision was, the boy can look after himself. As you’re fond of reminding me, you aren’t responsible for the choices of others.”

Seraphina squeezed her eyes shut before opening them again. She gave him a pained smile as he repeated the words she’d said to him so many moons ago.

“I know that,” she sighed and met his gaze, “but maybe if I had put my foot down — gods, if anything happens to him, I’ll never forgive myself — ”

Thancred raised his eyebrows as she squeezed her arms tighter around herself as though doing so would prevent the emotions she had been bottling up from escaping. He felt his heart break a little. With everything that had happened in recent weeks, it made sense that she would be feeling overwhelmed.

“I-I can’t fail again, Thancred,” her voice cracked as she voiced her worst fear, “and I’m scared that I will — just like I failed to kill Zenos— it’s all a mess.”

Thancred stood up and walked to the other side of the table. He reached out, holding her wrists in a loose grip as he drew her arms away from her chest and pulled her onto her feet. Seraphina still had nightmares of the night Zenos cut her down, it was no wonder that the idea that an Ascian was wearing his skin terrified her. She was trembling as he pulled her close, her whole body felt tense and stiff.

“You won’t have to face him alone,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to her forehead, “We’ll find a way to defeat Zenos for good.”

Thancred wasn’t sure if he was reassuring her or himself. His heart had sunk like a stone in the lake the minute they had discovered the empty grave and he had kept himself busy in an attempt to silence the disquieting voice in the back of his mind. It hadn’t worked of course. He should’ve known by now that it never did.

He stroked her back with his free hand, feeling her muscles relax a little. But she clutched him tightly, as though he was the only thing keeping her upright. She glanced up at him, there were black circles under her eyes. Guilt needled him, he should’ve been looking out for her, instead of focusing on himself. But there was no anger or resentment in her expression, it was one of the things he admired about her— her seemingly endless patience. With him. With a world that would always demand more and more of her. 

Seraphina blinked as she reached up and cradled his jaw. Her touch was so gentle as though she was holding something fragile and precious to her. 

“I wish you didn’t have to go,” she gave him a tired smile, “I wish I could go with you.”

“Someone’s got to keep Alisaie busy.”

He was relieved that his remark earned a chuckle. 

“I think I’d rather go and slay another primal.” To his disappointment, her smile faded to a more serious mien and her eyes clouded with concern again. “Promise me that you’ll be careful and return to me in one piece.”

A warm glowing feeling filled his chest and he couldn’t help but smile down at her.

“I’ll try my best,” he told her before kissing her lips softly. “Now, how about I draw you a bath so you can relax a bit more?”

“Thancred, you don’t have to do that —”

“I know, but I want to,” he told her. _If only to make up for neglecting you._ “Besides, you haven’t been looking after yourself. I know, I’ve watched you pick at your meals.”

She rolled her eyes at him and sighed.

“If you insist,” she replied, giving him a fond smile. “I take it that you intend on joining me?”  
Thancred gave her a lop-sided grin. 

“If you insist,” he replied, echoing her words as he took her by the hand and led her towards the bathroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was hard to write because I couldn't figure out the ending for some reason. But I think it kind of works? *shrug*
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading :)


	11. Heart to Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is feels-y. It takes place just before Shadowbringers so there are spoilers.
> 
> ~~I'm not crying, you're crying~~

It was a calm day in Coerthas, the sun shone through the clouds in the sky, causing the snow to glitter like tiny shards of glass. Seraphina tried to ignore the ache in her feet as she made her way up a familiar peak. She sighed as she saw the familiar headstone, standing out against the backdrop of snowy mountains and the spires of Ishgard.

“I’m sorry, it’s been a while, my friend,” she said as she cleared the snow away from Haurchefant’s grave and sat down in the snow.

She was about to replace the wilting flowers that someone had left there and frowned. They were fresh. How long had it been since someone had tended to his grave? Aymeric had mentioned that Ishgard had been subjected to some particularly heavy blizzards over the course of the past few weeks, so it made sense that visiting would have been untenable. Unless —

_Estinien._

The only person she knew of who would be stubborn enough to make the trek in the middle of a blinding snowstorm. Seraphina smirked a little as she imagined the dragoon, trudging through the thick snow, grumbling and swearing all the way. She placed her bunch of lilies next to his, enchanting them to protect the blooms from the snow as she recounted her adventures in Doma and Ala Mhigo.

“You would have liked Gosetsu, for someone who has been through so much, he has such a zest for life,” she told him, before moving onto more recent events.

Her voice trembled as she told Haurchefant of her growing dread when they had discovered Zenos’ empty grave, how her heart stopped beating for a second when she watched helplessly as Thancred collapsed in the throne room. She told him of her loneliness as one by one her friends fell to the Call and the fear that they would never recover. Tears began to well up in her eyes as she recalled her despair at watching Alisaie succumb to the mysterious voice, leaving her to face Zenos alone.

“Imagine my surprise when I woke up in Ishgard, Haurchefant,” she said, wiping her eyes, “If Estinien hadn’t saved me when he did, I’d be dead. He didn’t stick around of course — I would have liked to thank him.”

_And it would have been nice to see another friend._ Despite his cantankerous disposition, it would have been good to talk with the Dragoon, if only to take comfort in the company of someone familiar and trusted. But he'd left the moment he'd delivered her to Ishgard.

"Your father spoke to me before I came here," her lips quirked into a ghost of a smile, "I think he wanted to remind me that I still had family here. Oh! And I looked in on your brothers too — you'd be proud of them, I think."

Seraphina sighed, somehow feeling calmer now that she had voiced her feelings, even if it was to someone who couldn’t reply. At the very least, it felt good to feel something other than biting loneliness and fear. She stood up and bowed her head, muttering a quick prayer under her breath.

“I have to go now, Haurchefant,” she said, tucking her hair behind her ear, “I don’t know when I’ll be back but — watch over our friends for me, ok?”

Seraphina mounted her chocobo and began to make the long trek back to Mor Dhona. For the first time in weeks, she felt her resolve returning. She had no idea where she was going or what the mysterious voice wanted, but she was going to do everything she could to get her friends back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick question to those who had to play through the post-Stormblood patches before Shadowbringers came out, how did you deal with those cliffhangers? 
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading.


End file.
